#iConviction

I’ve been on the field, pro; I’ve been behind the wall, con. Now I’m back from the grave of failure with iConviction.
What is #iConviction? I like to describe it by what Bible teacher Howard Hendricks once said, “A belief is something you will argue about. A conviction is something you will die for!”
It seems many people are getting their individual identities from the world around and outside them –the iEconomy (iPhone, iPad, iMac, iMessage, iEverything). This is fickle and fleeting – as opposed to a core conviction within a person, which is valuable and affirming. Since the message we are putting out is usually determined by the conviction we hold within, then perhaps it’s time to get back to an internal and eternal core conviction – where our personal resolve is governed by God, regardless of the world’s pressures that surround us.
There will always be pressure, and it’s either a friend or a foe depending on how we let it mold us. I feel this pressure as of late, not because I am under it but because it is under me. It moves me forward and motivates me to press on for sure. Against the odds. Against the sways of the world. And even against the ways of my own will.
While I would prefer not to be vocal or visible, God’s grace cannot be contained nor can it be kept hidden. So the pressure pushes my iConviction out, like a volcano that was dormant for years and is now ready to burst forth. That best explains this transition from prison to freedom. Despite my desire to stay under the radar for the sake of being comfortable, I cannot, due to the way this pressure pushes me to accountability. It’s not my beliefs that garner respect from others; it’s my conviction that instigates reflection for others.
At times it is overwhelming because speaking out promotes acceptance or provokes rejection – the people hate me or they love me. Both responses to “my story” produce pressure, and I must balance both ends of the spectrum in order to remain whole and usable by God.
Almost immediately following my release from prison, I was given a variety of speaking opportunities: I was interviewed on national radio; I sat on a panel at the N.J. Wardens Association for Re-Entry Initiatives; I spoke at a community college, which launched a series of speaking engagements to high school and college-aged youth. I wholeheartedly stepped up to these platforms, knowing they are offered by God’s grace alone. And they created connections with very different audiences.
Yet, in every situation I encounter, there is still pressure. But here is the key: The more I own my conviction, the more value I bring to any situation. The greater pressure that is within me is the only pressure I want to govern me. “He who is in [me] is greater than he who is in the world.” (I John 4:4)
Pressure produces passion as a friend, but this same pressure can produce fear as a foe. I have to make a choice on a daily basis. Fear may be ever present, but courage pushes through the fear and makes passion the driving force.
So here we go. Join the #iConviction movement, and together we’ll begin to learn how to own it!
[Matthew Maher is an author and instigator, as well as a former professional athlete. His “Decisions Determine Destiny” assemblies service youth in the tri-state area. He served four years and seven months in N.J. State prison after pleading guilty in October 2009 to manslaughter and driving while intoxicated. He was released August 2014. His blogs have been read by over 500,000 people in every state, 121 countries, and in 67 different languages. You can learn more at www.themattmaherstory.com]