Parents’ New Fear: Cyber-bullying, Sexting

COURT HOUSE – It seems as if every child wants or has a cellphone. Many parents view giving them such a device partly as a reward and partly as a modern right-of-passage.
Detectives from the Cape May County Prosecutor’s Office, Kyle MacDonald, and Danielle Mitchell warned about 30 parents Dec. 10 at Middle Township Performing Arts Center that those phones need to be strictly monitored.
Not simply for making and receiving calls, cellphones have cameras linked to the world, and often that leads to illicit actions.
For children, there might be a temptation to snap photos of themselves, not only smiling and at parties but in various stages of undress. Often, the latter type, partially or fully nude, has been sent by an unsuspecting child to a friend.
That is termed “sexting.”
But then, according to the detectives, that friend may seek more illicit images, and failure to produce them could result in that “friend” posting the image(s) on various forms of social media. Soon an entire student body may view those images and the person who posted them becomes a target of “cyber-bullying.” Such bullying has led to student suicides, the detectives told the group of parents.
When such action becomes a reality, the County Prosecutor’s Office’s Special Victims Unit and or High Tech Crimes Unit is often called to investigate and prosecute.
MacDonald said that members of the Prosecutor’s Office have gone to all schools in the county and have spoken to students on an age-appropriate basis about bullying.
Fourth graders are told about cyber-bullying.
Older students are told about the potential for problems that sexting and cyber-bullying possess.
Teens find new cellphone apps almost daily, the detectives said. Some of them seem, to an unsuspecting parent, as simple as a calculator. However, after entering code numbers, those apps unveil a dark world where those illicit images can be hidden and shared, often to the subject’s disgrace and/or demise.
Cellphones have made it easier than ever for those who would bully a sensitive, gullible person. Based on an individual’s religion, sexuality, or physical characteristics, bullying can become ever-present and, for many children, overbearing. That is why they may contemplate or commit suicide.
“We tell students (after viewing a video) there is a lot you can do. First, tell a trusted adult,” said MacDonald.
He noted that bullying often stops when students “stick up against bullying” and let it be known, “It’s not welcome here.”
Mitchell cautioned parents, who may want to interact with the bully, that may worsen the situation.
With hurt feelings, it is never known what a student has going on in their mind, and what may “put them over the line,” she added.
“Everyone’s line is totally different,” she said.
MacDonald said part of the youthful fascination with acting via cellphone is that they believe their actions are anonymous, they are not.
“Everything can be traced back to them,” MacDonald said. He added, “Kids are less shy online.”
Investigators have seen cross hairs placed on a student or over their face. That is a form of cyber-bullying, he added.
Cyber-bullying has happened to children as young as 12 years old while others have happened in the sixth grade.
MacDonald said that harassment charges have been made locally against students as young as sixth and seventh grades. He cited the state’s cyber-crime statute which may be utilized rather than a child pornography charge.
Sexting has been found among children as young as 9 and 10 years old. That occurred when they had shared “inappropriate pictures,” including nude photos and images of body parts usually clothed.
Age often plays a part in how the Prosecutor’s Office may charge a person who engages in sexting and cyber-bullying.
Often a charge of invasion of privacy is the lowest level used. Older individuals may face Megan’s Law offenses.
“There is no such thing as a sexting law,” said Mitchell.
The detectives also cautioned parents that unsuspecting children may believe they are chatting online with someone their age or sex, but predators are often on the other end of the conversation. They will press the child for more and more suggestive images, and use the leverage of telling their parents should they fail to comply with demands.
The detectives reminded parents that they are often the ones who own the cellphone, and thus should not believe they are infringing upon their child’s privacy by keeping a close monitor on their cellphone and internet activity.
The detectives showed a video clip of an incident at Lower Cape May Regional High School when 20 were charged for trading nude images of under-age classmates.
The males were “passing (nude images of females) like trading cards,” said MacDonald.
While 20 were charged, MacDonald noted that investigators interviewed about 50 students involved in that incident.
Mitchell said that incident was the impetus for the office to talk to students in every school and to make them understand there are serious consequences for improper sending of photographs or threats by cellphone or internet.
Additionally, the detectives warned parents to be aware that some apps children use may be able to track them regardless where they go.
“They are your devices. Get an app that manages apps. Keep tabs on your kids,” warned MacDonald.
Mitchell said there are strict laws that teachers and principals have to take down what students tell them.
MacDonald also told parents that teachers can check a student’s phone.