COURT HOUSE – Family tragedy and despair can sometimes lead to redemption and hope.
“Adoption Day” in Cape May County illustrated how some dedicated family members and loving “strangers” joined to save children living in despair and need.
On Nov. 20, 16 children were officially adopted by 11 “forever families” in the Family Division of Cape May County Superior Court. The ceremony began in the large jury room where tables were decorated with balloons and streamers, and where coloring books and crayons awaited children whose lives were about to be forever changed, whether or not they realized it.
Steve and Kelly O’Neal never expected to become parents again. They sat at a decorated table with nearly 4-year-old grandson Zachary as he played with his video game and looked around the room with big eyes and wonderment at all the activity.
Steve O’Neal related that New Jersey Division of Child Protection and Permanency had removed Zach from his previous home in February. Zach had been neglected to the point that he withdrew from people, and would not communicate with anyone.
O’Neal stated that Child Protection and Permanency thought he was autistic based on his behavior, but that since receiving Zach in February, he has opened up, is very verbal and engaged, and is developmentally up to par with his peers. He is an outdoor child who rides his bike everywhere.
His now-precocious nature was demonstrated during the ceremony when Zach led the assembled crowd in applause after each speaker. The family’s story seemed to prove that out of the tragedy of a broken family, came redemption and hope for Zach and, in a way, for the O’Neals as well.
The special yearly Adoption Day ceremony held in Cape May County Courthouse was hosted by the Cape May County Superior Court and New Jersey Division of Child Protection and Permanency, as well as the Court Appointed Special Advocates (CASA) of Atlantic and Cape May counties.
Superior Court Family Division Presiding Judge Nancy L. Ridgway declared the day “The happiest day in the court system.” Ridgway explained that she and her husband are also adoptive parents and that thought of adoption during the Thanksgiving holiday “is what Thanksgiving is all about.”
Assignment Judge Julio Mendez stated “In my view, these are the most important cases in the Court House.” He added “None of the high-profile cases I hear during the year are more important than protecting our children.”
Debbie Swint from Lehighton, Pa. also found herself fulfilling a dual role. She was first an aunt to Ryan Kirk, 4, Bristol Kirk, 5, and Daniel Craner, 8. Due to an unfortunate family situation, she has stepped up to adopt all three Cape May County children, with the help of Grandma Eleanor Megaw.
Ridgway was particularly pleased with that family who came all the way from Pennsylvania to bring stability and love to three little ones who deserved much better than what they had experienced.
Clearly, not every adoption begins with a tale of heartbreak and neglect as was experienced by those two families at the morning ceremony. Many other adoptees merely needed a home and some love to continue their development into productive young ladies and men.
It was gratifying to learn that many families are strong in the face of despair, and still capable of picking up the pieces of a broken family to ensure that succeeding generations have a solid foundation for their own future families.
Cape May County Surrogate Susan Sheppard added that her office’s role is to create and set up the file and do the preliminary works on each case, then refer the file to the Superior Court to finalize.
After the ceremony, each child was given a bear donated by the Cape May County Bar Association.
To contact Jim McCarty, email jmccarty@cmcherald.com.
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