I may not be a great writer, but I am honest. Maybe I am too honest. I share my heart on this blog week after week. I share my weaknesses and pains. You have been there through these 6 years without my son Matthew, through several births of grandchildren, and my frustrations with my health. I thank you who read this for your patience and compassion toward me.
I have been struggling what to write these last two weeks. With Easter last weekend, and Spring events, I wanted to be positive and grateful. I wanted to express how thankful I am for Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross. No greater gift! The joy I have in my children, grandchildren, and family members that I am priviledged to live near. God knows my gratitude, but He also knows my heart has been saddened and fearful.
After several weeks of testing, I was diagnosed with a NEW chronic disease. I really wanted to know what was wrong, but I wanted a quick fix. I can’t see the doctor for two weeks, so the first thing I do wrong is to look up Gastroparesis on the internet. The causes and symptoms are terrible, and this only brought on fear. The second thing I did wrong was to talk to people who have the disease. More horrible information that frightened me more at this point.
Well, I go this coming Monday to the doctor, and find out what will work best for ME. Even though this all frightens me, I know God is in control. Fear of the unknown is not of God. So whatever the outcome, I know God is with me through it.
Keep you posted.
