To the Editor:
On family outings to Wanamaker’s Department Store, in Philadelphia, my four excited younger siblings and I would fan out in a frenzy of running-touching-asking.
Invariably, I’d feel a thump on the back of my head. “Act regular,” my father would admonish.
I didn’t realize until adolescent branching out took me beyond my family circle that dad possessed his own language. “Act regular” in dad-speak translated to “behave like a normal human being.”
A couple of thumps upside the head were in order on Oscar night, one for making a joke about a disorder and the other for a slap heard around the world, but why would two celebrities care about exercising good manners and restraint when bad behavior has become, not just the norm, but an art form among Americans?
As a card-carrying member of the Woodstock counterculture and a silver-haired hippie, I never dreamed I’d hear myself advocating for conformity but… seriously. Doesn’t anyone “act regular” anymore?
If our nation was the Catholic high school that I attended, half of the students would be sitting in the principal’s office waiting for Father Walmsley to hand us a detention slip.
The way I see it, the transition from civilized adult to uncontrollable toddler behavior began when we became expected to choose teams… on everything.
Democrat or Republican? Do you get your Covid facts from Trump or Fauci? Mask-wearer or mask-hater? Do you or don’t you support gay rights? Creationism or Darwinism? Pro-life or pro-choice? Are you a global warming believer or denier? Should we get involved in Russia’s attack on Ukraine or worry about our own house?
Regardless of the camp we choose, it takes nothing more than disagreement to justify all manner of antisocial behavior from vulgarity to assault.
Don’t misunderstand me. I don’t discourage strong opinions or high emotions. I’ve got a wheelbarrow full of them and have participated in my share of heated debates. Rudeness, personal malice, aggression, and violence, however, are horses of another malignant color.
I wonder if we could go back to being regular. To choose good behavior. To accept the inevitability of having our feelings hurt sometimes without resorting to the knee-jerk response of revenge. To allow different strokes for different folks. To feel no responsibility to prove a point. To choose peace over being right. To sacrifice a laugh for decency’s sake. To swallow an insult for civility’s sake. Even if every impulse tells us to rise from our seats and storm the stage.
