Impact of Fathers on Their Daughters

To The Editor;
One doesn’t have to look very far to see too many young women involved in tragic relationships with young men who care nothing for them. They cling and gravitate to guys who readily impregnate them and then move on to the next conquest. And somehow in their twisted view of life, many of these young women feel this type of treatment equates to love…children having children and society paying the cost and bearing the social and financial burdens. A growing number of young women, for some reason purposely allow inexperienced, immature and self-absorbed guys to use them repeatedly, then toss them aside, pregnant and alone.
I recently had the opportunity to talk with an intelligent and mature woman named Donna, a good friend of mine, about this growing menace to our society. She brought out so many causes and unintended consequences relating to young women and their views of life, love and motherhood that I was awash in her grasp of the situation. One thing she brought up stuck with me because I too, felt it played a major part in the development of young people, especially young girls. She mentioned the impact of girls growing up without fathers in the home.
I know there are many single-parent homes out there and they are doing just fine nurturing the members of those families. But this trend of children having children and young girls seeking love in all the wrong places, for all the wrong reasons with all the wrong people, is a direct byproduct in many cases, of single-parent families headed by females.
Girls without fathers are the most vulnerable to smooth talking guys, and without a caring and loving father to educate and protect them from such predatory males, these young girls become easy prey for young males without scruples, maturity or a moral compass. Girls without fathers, said Donna, often are uncertain of exactly what a male-female relationship entails.
This is just one of numerous results of our society taking a “hear no evil, see no evil” approach towards the issue of single-parent families. Donna also said that in fact, through public policy initiatives, like welfare and other “temporary help” programs, we as a society have actually financed the escalation of this trend. I had to agree with her. The results of these programs are just now beginning to manifest themselves.
According to David Blankenhorn, president of the New York-based Institute for American Values, the effects of fatherlessness for many young girls emerge most visibly during adolescence, frequently in the form of precocious sexuality resulting in unintended pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases including AIDS.
Evidence from across the nation suggests that improving the well-being of young girls depends greatly upon us finding ways to bring fathers back into the home. To do so, we will have to deepen our cultural understanding of the importance of fathers to the well being of children in general. We must restore marriage as the valued and respected institution within which to rear children, and reduce the incidence of divorce.
Donna mentioned in conclusion that we, as a society, are running out of time. I agree. Soon the majority of families in America will be absent a father. When this happens, if it hasn’t already, the social and psychological forces seeking to rationalize away father absence will overwhelm those seeking to restore his presence. The tragic results are before our very eyes today, young girls trying to find love through sex, having babies that they cannot morally or maturely care for. I don’t know how we can reverse this social and economic decline, but for the sake of our children we had better keep on trying.
JIMMIE HOLLIS
Millville