On Fri. Oct. 22, if you were at Cape May’s Grand Hotel, perhaps you saw me, camera in hand, snapping happily as finely clad guests simultaneously donated $125 per person for the Volunteer in Medicine and enjoyed elegant beachfront dining and dancing. My assignment for the evening was to capture this event honoring Dr. Thomas Dierkes, and Will and Janice Morey, three of many individuals who donate precious time, energy and funds to provide no-cost health care to residents of Cape May County unable to afford health services.
Many organizations need volunteers to keep the organization afloat. They rely entirely on funds donated by charitable organizations, grant money or private donors. As citizens in our community, there are countless ways we can give back. All benefit our mental health.
Whether you choose to work at one of the many local thrift shops run by our churches, give back by volunteering at Cape Regional Medical Center, train your dog to be a therapy dog helping school children read better, or donate to Volunteers in Medicine, the sense of doing something greater than yourself is a sure fire way to know you are contributing to your world. Making a contribution to the world at large is one of the hallmarks of a healthy adult.
Did you ever wonder why bank execs, pastors, nurses, lawyers, Moms and Grandmoms take time from their busy lives to volunteer at agencies when they could be relaxing? Erik Erikson, the masterful architect of the “Eight Stages of Man, states that between ages 35 and 65, adults must come to terms with the conflict between “generativity” (the concern of establishing and guiding the next generation) or “stagnation” as one asks oneself, “Will I produce something of real value in my life?”
During our middle years, our primary developmental task is to contribute to society to guide future generations. When one makes a contribution towards the betterment of society, this provides a sense of generativity. In contrast, a person whose life centers around the self to the exclusion of others is in danger of developing stagnation. Oddly enough, merely having children does not insure generativity. Instead, volunteering for a service-oriented organization can promote a sense of doing something greater than oneself.
One organization relying entirely on volunteer energy is the Volunteers in Medicine of Cape May County, whose goal is to understand and serve the health and wellness needs of the medically uninsured or people in our county. This tiny band of dedicated volunteers does a bang up job. I should know. I am beginning my sixth year on the Board of Directors, joined by others who understand that giving back is a centrally important part of being fully human.
The goal is to serve the underserved, despite budget cuts and economic catastrophes. As is true of many volunteer boards, the VIM Board works hard and maintains a necessary sense of humor…at times it sort of feels like a family, pulling together to make lemonade out of the lemons called diabetes, heart disease, and life threatening illness.
VIM relies on a mostly-female volunteer army to handle intake and daily operations at the tiny clinic on Route 9. These women, successfully engineering already full lives, tell me that it feels necessary to them to give back to a world that has been good to them.
Not long ago I sat with the volunteers at a dinner honoring Marilyn Golden, the pioneering nurse who headed VIM during its early years. It was clear that all the lively, good-natured women at the table admired both Marilyn’s vision and her dedication to excellence. No job was too large, no job too small for the petite silver-haired woman with sparkly eyes and ready laugh.
Marilyn actually provided a model for the volunteers, showing them what it means to get a job done, and working overtime each week despite inadequate financial compensation. Why did she do it? I can still see her perched on the edge of one of the basic VIM fold up chairs, saying, “Judith, whaddayamean why do I work so long for VIM? Nursing has been very good to me and this is a way I can give back.”
Marilyn’s words echo the sentiments of all volunteers everywhere. All of us get something that Erikson helped us to acknowledge as key in optimal human life. By giving back to our local not-for-profit organizations, we are actually able to help make our world a better place. And what could be better than that?
To consider: How do I contribute to make our world a better place? How good does it make me feel to give my time, energy and funds to an organization bigger than I am?
(Coche of Stone Harbor educates the public in mental health issues. She can be reached at jmcoche@gmail.com or 215-859-1050.)
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