Emptiness ‘Fills’ Grandparents Dealing With Tragic Loss of Beloved Nioami

GREEN CREEK – On Oct. 10, throughout the State of New Jersey, as well as throughout the nation, drivers are being asked to drive like their life, and the lives of others, depend on it.
According to the state’s Office of Attorney General, the lives of more than 700 each year are lost to motor vehicle crashes. To help bring awareness to that problem, drivers are being encouraged to be “exceptionally careful” on Oct. 10, “Put the Brakes on Fatalities Day,” “so that, for at least one day, there will be no fatalities on New Jersey roads.”
According to State Police statistics, from Jan. 1 through Oct. 8, 2012, Cape May County experienced nine fatalities; six of which occurred in Middle Township. That number includes two pedestrians killed while crossing Rio Grande Boulevard, a motorcycle crash on Route 147, a single-car accident on Court House-Dennisville Road, and the accident that snuffed out the lives of Nioami Faith Lazicki and Ashley Dauber.
“Every day is a struggle,” said Brian Lazicki as he and his wife, Pat, sat in the living room of their cozy home.
In a split second, the couple’s life took a tragic turn when their 15-year-old granddaughter, Nioami and her cousin, Ashley, 13, were killed by an alleged drunk driver as they walked along Bayshore Road in Green Creek the evening of July 31.
“I miss her bubbliness,” said Pat of her granddaughter.
“She was always a joy whenever you were around her,” said Brian of his granddaughter. “She never had anything bad to say, and if you were feeling bad, she’d try and help you feel better.”
According to the couple, Nioami had just completed her freshman year as a shared-time student at Middle Township High School and Cape May County Technical High School. According to her grandmother, Nioami was looking forward to starting her sophomore year as a full-time student at the Technical School. She hoped one day to become a criminal profiler.
Because Nioami and her family lived next door to the grandparents, she was an integral part of their lives.
“We saw her every day,” said Pat.
“Every morning during school I’d watch her go by, from one window to the next,” said Brian. “I’d hear the school bus and I’d start looking out and see her walking.”
Because of their close proximity, Brian Lazicki recalled how the night of the accident he ran to the scene when their daughter, Nioami’s mother Christina, banged on the couple’s door after receiving a call from her other daughter, Farrahanne, telling her mother the two teens had been struck by a car. Farrahanne was walking a few steps behind her sister and cousin and was saved from serious injury. Both Brian and Christina rushed to the spot where the three girls were hit.
Brian and his daughter were first on the scene, along with a Good Samaritan who stopped to assist after witnessing the accident.
“Christina was running from Nioami to Ashley, from Ashley to Nioami,” said Pat Lazicki.
Brian said he and his daughter administered CPR to the two girls for almost 12 minutes until emergency rescue personnel arrived, but it was too late.
“I was performing CPR,” said Brian. He said he told Christina to “give her breaths.”
“But there was no way to save her,” said Brian, his voice halting. “Even though I tried. They said she died instantly.”
Like the proverbial pebble thrown in a lake, the rings of grief wrought by Nioami’s death are far-reaching.
As they spoke about the loss of their granddaughter, the couple’s grief was palpable. Tears flowed easily as they shared their memories of Nioami, her life, and the future denied her.
“I miss her,” said Pat. “I miss that beautiful girl every day.”
They shared how, as a small child in Philadelphia, they taught Nioami to be a Flyers fan and Dallas Cowboy cheerleader. They spoke of sharing time while doing art projects together and spending time with their granddaughter as she programmed electronics for them.
Pat shared how the couple’s 3-year-old grandson continues to search for his older cousin.
“He keeps asking ‘Where’s my Ni-Ni,” she said.
The family has told the young boy his Ni-Ni is in heaven.
“He wants to go up there and bring her back down because she’s sick,” said Pat.
Brian said the toddler asks his father if they can go get Nioami and take her to the hospital to make her better.
The couple spoke of the need for drivers to make good choices to spare other families the pain they are experiencing.
“Think twice before you get in that car,” said Pat. “Make happy choices. Make fun choices.”
“Have a clear mind on the road,” said Brian. “Start paying attention.”
The grandmother shared how Nioami and Farrahanne would come to “Mom Mom’s and Pop Pop’s house” for dinner. “And that’s what we used to do on Monday nights. And there hasn’t been a Monday night, since,” said Pat tearfully.
“The special times have been taken away from us,” said Pat. “How do you deal with the holidays coming up?”
After the accident, a roadside memorial was erected where the girls’ friends gathered. In order to keep others safe and off the road where their granddaughter and her cousin were killed, the Lazickis have erected a small, carefully-tended garden in their front yard to honor their granddaughter’s memory. There her friends may safely gather.
In addition to the grandparents’ garden, family members successfully lobbied the county to lower the speed limit on Bayshore Road (CR 603). They asked that lights and sidewalks be added. Those have yet to occur. At a September meeting of freeholders, the speed limit on Bayshore Road was lowered from 45 mph to 40 mph in the area near the accident site. The lowering resulted after a traffic study and public outcry.
Nioami’s friends have made pink bracelets in her memory. They are being sold for $3 each. Money collected from the sale of those bracelets is part of a fund the family hopes to use to construct sidewalks along the road.
For Pat and Brian, however, their loss that night will never change, and the tragedy that resulted from it will remain with them the rest of their lives. The couple, who have been together 40 years, are the parents of three children and eight grandchildren.
“There will always be eight, not seven,” said the grieving grandmother. “I want to know when my test will be over. What more do I have to prove? When is enough, enough? I miss that beautiful girl every day.”
The loss of their granddaughter left a hole in their lives, the couple said. “There is no reward for this,” said Pat. “I don’t know how to get over this. I still want that girl to come through that back door. There is emptiness.”
“I am so filled with emptiness,” said Brian in a hushed voice. “I never knew emptiness could be so filling.”